The women's rights movement just keeps stalling...
Honestly, March is the best time of year for basketball fans. The NCAA tournament provides non-stop action for 4 straight days, with millions upon millions of brackets and dollars hanging in the balance. Also, "cinderella" teams often are darlings of the media, such as 13 seed (!) Bradley University and their surefire NBA prospect, Center Patrick O'Bryant, and 11 seed George Mason, which ousted not only my elite 8 pick, Michigan State (the last time I trust Tom Izzo) but also perennial media fave and defending champion North Carolina. But instead of reading about that this morning on SI.com or ESPN.com or Sportsline.com, I was reading about "tournament history".
Okay.
I'm a basketball buff. I like basketball history. Certainly, the NCAA has plenty of history to talk about and to be made... so what was it? New scoring record? Biggest upset of all time? Most teams from one conference winning or losing? Highest scoring game? Longest fucking three pointer?
No, no, no, no, and sadly, no.
This "history" was made in the women's NCAA tournament (shudder). If that doesn't sound bad enough, wait until you hear the rest.
This so-called history occurred when... a female basketball player...
...dunked TWICE in a single game.
Honestly. Who gives a flying fuck? So what? The female in question is Candace Parker, a Tennessee player who unquestionably possesses basketball talent - but really. Who cares? She dunked twice? Oh my God!
The headlines include such masterpieces as "Parker Dunks Way Into History" and "Jam Session". So fucking what? Did you see Rudy Gay windmill that fucking thing against Kentucky the other day? That shit was ridiculous. Or Rodney Carney's alley-oop against Bucknell?
Oops. I forgot, they aren't female , and therefore aren't making history.
How fucking lame. Women want equal this and equal that, but when it really comes down to anything, they really want what I call "special rights", not equal rights. They want something when it's beneficial to them, and push it off on men when it isn't.
FUCK OFF.
Those dunks were so shitty. Check the tape. Look at the pictures. She barely manages to grab the fucking rim. The ball doesn't even look like it's going in at first. How embarassing if that is your history-making moment.
Her own coach said she was "just relieved that she wasn't hurt" following said dunks. How lame is that? Does anyone worry about Andre Iguodala after he tomahawks over some douche like Jerome James in the middle of a game? Or when Josh Smith slams home a reverse on a fast break? Or when LeBron dunks on anyone? Of course not, because if someone did say that, they'd be laughed out of the fucking building, and everyone would think that LeBron, Josh, and Andre were fucking pussies. It's bad enough that basketball fans have to see shitty commercials for the fucking WNBA every 4 minutes while watching real hoops, but now we have to swallow two shitty dunks as "history" and evidence that "the game is changing"?
You females should stick to watching "Friends", "Sex & the City", and "American Idol", because when you think you're making basketball history, you're just embarassing yourself.
P.S. - No one gives a shit about the women's tournament, because there are never any upsets and the same 4 teams are always in the final 4. Ever seen anyone fill out a women's bracket come tournament time? Didn't think so. Now go cook me a fucking steak and shut up.
Okay.
I'm a basketball buff. I like basketball history. Certainly, the NCAA has plenty of history to talk about and to be made... so what was it? New scoring record? Biggest upset of all time? Most teams from one conference winning or losing? Highest scoring game? Longest fucking three pointer?
No, no, no, no, and sadly, no.
This "history" was made in the women's NCAA tournament (shudder). If that doesn't sound bad enough, wait until you hear the rest.
This so-called history occurred when... a female basketball player...
...dunked TWICE in a single game.
Honestly. Who gives a flying fuck? So what? The female in question is Candace Parker, a Tennessee player who unquestionably possesses basketball talent - but really. Who cares? She dunked twice? Oh my God!
The headlines include such masterpieces as "Parker Dunks Way Into History" and "Jam Session". So fucking what? Did you see Rudy Gay windmill that fucking thing against Kentucky the other day? That shit was ridiculous. Or Rodney Carney's alley-oop against Bucknell?
Oops. I forgot, they aren't female , and therefore aren't making history.
How fucking lame. Women want equal this and equal that, but when it really comes down to anything, they really want what I call "special rights", not equal rights. They want something when it's beneficial to them, and push it off on men when it isn't.
FUCK OFF.
Those dunks were so shitty. Check the tape. Look at the pictures. She barely manages to grab the fucking rim. The ball doesn't even look like it's going in at first. How embarassing if that is your history-making moment.
Her own coach said she was "just relieved that she wasn't hurt" following said dunks. How lame is that? Does anyone worry about Andre Iguodala after he tomahawks over some douche like Jerome James in the middle of a game? Or when Josh Smith slams home a reverse on a fast break? Or when LeBron dunks on anyone? Of course not, because if someone did say that, they'd be laughed out of the fucking building, and everyone would think that LeBron, Josh, and Andre were fucking pussies. It's bad enough that basketball fans have to see shitty commercials for the fucking WNBA every 4 minutes while watching real hoops, but now we have to swallow two shitty dunks as "history" and evidence that "the game is changing"?
You females should stick to watching "Friends", "Sex & the City", and "American Idol", because when you think you're making basketball history, you're just embarassing yourself.
P.S. - No one gives a shit about the women's tournament, because there are never any upsets and the same 4 teams are always in the final 4. Ever seen anyone fill out a women's bracket come tournament time? Didn't think so. Now go cook me a fucking steak and shut up.
Labels: basketball, women
posted by guru at 9:39 PM
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